MY Bad. I Don't Actually Want to Die...

I JUST WANT ALL OF THIS TO END ALREADY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I think talking about this really isn't that good after all... :/
Another conversation with my friend concerning the topic of my life just occurred and my desire to end life just increased. ==

When I said that I just want all of this to end...
I don't really want to die, I just don't want to live. I don't want to feel, I don't want to work, I don't want to do anything.
...Did I mention that Depression is a serious mental illness?
Is this above thinking because of my Depression? :/
Hmm... can't tell... although I did say that pessimism and depression are two different things...

I've been wondering, you see, one of my friends, Em-chan, said that she once helped one of her friends overcome Depression when they were in Grade 8.
I don't know how the friend got Depression, but I don't really think mine is that easy to cure because the cause...

The cause of my Depression is quite vague, but I guess I'd just pin it down by saying that the reason for it was life itself. How ever I cannot escape that... of course, unless I commit suicide. :P

Do you understand my words, or rather, my senseless rants, more now? Or maybe you understood from the start?

I hate it so much, that I want to run away.
Of course I could instead choose to fight against it, but I'd still be in it, wouldn't I? I can't escape life, unless I choose death. :3
Or a coma. xP
On the brink between life and death, however I won't be involved in either. Paradise. xD
However then my parents will have to pay for the hospital fees...
No matter what I do, I'll trouble them, eh? Well, not "trouble", but they'll end up needing to do something for me no matter what I do. Or even if I don't do anything at all.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

JUST END ALREADY!!!
I JUST WANT EVERYTHING TO END!!! EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!
INCLUDING LIFE!!!

GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

If not, deprive me of Depression then make me win a lottery that'll make me a billionaire!!
Maybe then I'd want to live. :3

However the chance of me winning lotteries and becoming a billionaire is quite non-existent.